Dear Jimmy,
I picked up this postcard of you when I was fifteen because I thought you were cute and funny.
I just wanted to take this opportunity to congratulate you on accomplishing so much with your career over these last seven years. You are now the host of your very own show! I've heard it's not very funny, but maybe it will get better? I'm admittedly a little bitter that Conan is no longer in New York. He's just such a New York kinda guy. I will work hard to put this undeserved hostility to rest.
Love always,
Alice